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“Maybe they’d talk about how they’re really into anime, manga or ‘Have you seen that scary Japanese or Korean movie?’ The media interests rather than culture interests made it kind of shallow.” The bias Asian men encounter in dating bleeds into other parts of their lives as well.It just means they often find themselves making an effort to improve their chances.

Compared with other men she met on Match.com, Maltempo was far less flirtatious and more direct.

But after a friend urged Jiang, a 27-year-old native of China, to give Maltempo a chance, she realized that unlike some other people she was talking to, there was substance behind Maltempo’s messages.

Even though intellectually I knew it wasn’t true, but emotionally [I was] blaming myself for not meeting a seemingly objective standard of what is attractive.” MC Maltempo, a 36-year-old Korean American who grew up in Golden, Colo., also met his significant other online.

He first joined in 2006, but only started using it seriously in 2013.

“Even if you give them a little bit of room in terms of looks, that still leaves a really high bar for Asian men to be considered attractive at all.” To improve his success rate on Match.com, Maltempo created a rule for himself.